Five Ways To Make New Relationship Work

New relationships can be exciting, and the feeling of being in-love is at times, overwhelming and uncontainable to the point of saturating the relationships and your partner with too much even though the relationship status is somewhat ambiguous or in the early stage. While there are much advice and tips on how to maintain relationships and how to handle problems along the way, it is also good to address the do’s and don’ts of new relationships.

The problem is that people rarely perceive themselves accurately.  What actually blocks a person from achieving their goals is fear. — Colleen Mullen, PsyD LMFT 

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Do Away With Labels 

“Hearing other couples calling each other sweet nicknames is such a pressure to think of what possible names we should call each other,” Moira, 26-year-old, confessed when she and her boyfriend was starting to go out. “Apparently, we decided to call each other’s names and no more cheesy labels allowed.” 

Pet names or terms of endearment are fun and allows the couple to show affection. However, this does not define the totality of the relationship. Don’t stress too much about what names to call each other. In times of introducing your partner to families and friends, it is best to address them by name.  

Rather than simply living out our unique and individual giftedness, engaging in life with the fervor of a love affair, our brains have developed deeply entrenched ruts that drag us through baseless fears and career-stopping apprehensions. — Donna Rockwell, Psy.D.

Take It One Day At A Time 

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In any relationship, it always starts with the honeymoon phase. This is the best portion of the relationship where you and your partner want to spend every waking second together, doing everything or nothing at all. Falling prey to this illusion is easy. When a relationship begins like this, the end of the spark and mystery can also mean the end of the relationship altogether. Retaining your own time and space is essential. Don’t prioritize the relationship over the time spent with family, friends and other things you are interested in pursuing.  

 

Master The Art Of Dividing Your Time 

Practice the division of your leisure time using the 50-30-20 rule. As per Wendy Atterberry, the author who introduced this practice, the rule should apply to the following distributions: 50% to your relationship and significant other, 30% to your close friends and family, and 20% to yourself. There should be a division of your time to maximize and give attention to the things and persons that matter. There should be no room for excuses that you are not able to attend a graduation ceremony of a sibling or have coffee with your friends. To maintain a happy and satisfying relationship, the rule should be discussed among yourselves and stick to the plan.  

Every person, regardless of their history, deserves a life with healthy relationships and sex that they enjoy. — Robyn E. Brickel, M.A., LMFT

Never Utilize The SMS To Talk About Important Matters 

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While texting is convenient and accessible, it works best in staying in contact with family and friends or a helpful tool to have when planning for night outs. For far more critical conversations, it is best to do away with the practice. Face-to-face communication is still the acceptable method of sharing ideas and messages as this allows full comprehension of the ideas and messages presented. Texting and reading SMS only gives you a partial impression of the other person wants to convey. A worse thing that could happen is miscommunication and subjective interpretation of the message received, thus making things more complicated. 

 

Be Who You Are And Stick To It 

Here’s one thing that people fail in relationships – trying to someone you are not. Even in movies and romance books. This is just a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. True love does not demand anything nor have pre-requisites to offer. If you were changing your true personality just because this person likes it, in the end, you will become unhappy and feel a void in the relationship. Be true to yourself and let the other person love you for what you indeed are.